I read a friends blog post just today and really loved what she had to say. I don't think that I could sum up the meaning behind her words any better. And of course, it comes at a time when I NEEDED TO HEAR it again. I often forget how caught up in life I can become, and then things get "unbearable" and "tough" and I wonder WHY ON EARTH am I doing this. So to my friend Christina -- you've just answered one of my prayers!!!
No, Seriously -- I've been "battling" with a few of my challenges lately and wonder how am I ever going to get through this, and can't help but think that so many other women might think that it's nothing, but to me --it's a huge make it or break it moment, and I just have to sit and remember that our Heavenly Father is there and like with all struggles, or difficulty that comes our way there is something to be learned. So even though there are many of my friends who have said, " how do you do it" well the honest simple truth is " I don't"
I by myself can't do it, I need extra strength, patience, knowledge, love .... and the list goes on and on. I don't keep everything together. I had someone say to me the other night while leaving the state fair after the Rodeo that I was BRAVE with TWO little ones ( I was carrying Baby Boy, and T-Man was right beside me, while my husband and other children were several paces in front of me) It doesn't seem all that brave to me to have five kids or do things with a few little ones, but I forget to others it might seem that way. But I can assure you that I don't come without my own struggles and trials that keep life on an ongoing rollercoaster ride for me.
So my house isn't clean all the time, I sometimes do the "quick fix" and gather all the out of place items from the main room and if I can quickly put it away before someone comes over I do, otherwise ( Okay I'm now giving away my secret!! shhh don't tell anyone else) and then I go and dump the things (mostly laundry) into my room on my bed and close the door on my way out. Out of Sight out of mind right???? Well it is until I need to go to bed and then you guessed it -- back to the living room!! So it's mostly clothes that are the culprit here. But the point is -- I'm busy with my kids!! Trying to teach them things about the gospel, about life, watching little shows with them and talking about it, or I'm trying to do my church callings, I'm helping my kids with their homework, I'm trying to soothe the cryind and screaming child, settling fights between my kids, cleaning up the spilled liquid messes in my house or fishing out the non-trash items that have been mysteriously placed in the garbage can, YUCK, I'm changing the dirty diapers or the child that had an "accident" and needs clean clothes, I'm fixing the ouchies that the child got while riding their bike, I'm trying to fix dinner, I'm trying, I'm TRYing, I'm TRYING!! The list of course, goes on. It is said, that a mother's main purpose is to "nurture" her children. And as another friend pointed out, sometimes in the early years of a childs life more time is spent on the nurturing then the house cleaning. And not many people, especially HUSBANDS can really see the nurturing that takes place.
So for any husbands that are reading this, the worst thing you can ask your wife when you come home from work is " What did you do today?"
I just have to realize that they won't be this "young" forever and it will be gone all TOO QUICKLY, so I want to enjoy it while I can and let the housework be, because the housework will never end, but my baby won't stay a baby. Which is even more sad, seeing how he just might be our last. But no matter what I do, as long as I'm doing the BEST that I can -- I'm AMAZING, just like my friend Christina said. And just as she said it, you are all amazing too!! No matter what your circumstances are. But I just go back to the scripture that says that we won't be tested beyond what we can bare, the Lord is mindful of us and our strengths and weaknesses ... and even if we think it's more than we can bare, he knows otherwise. So I just need to press forward and stay close to the Spirit, and my Heavenly Father and I can overcome anything. OF course, the great encouraging words from friends and family help too!!